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Four Steps To Overcome Loss

By Don Loftis | 04.19.17

We all experience certain losses in our lives.   It may be a job loss or the death of a loved one or even a disability that takes away an enjoyable hobby.  All of them inject hurt into our lives that can lead to periods of  deep discouragement or depression.


Along with his excellent work with teens, Lonnie Jones is a Licensed Professional Counselor who has been in private practice for 19 years.  In a recent article in the magazine known as Think, Lonnie shared four steps to overcoming grief.  Whether this process takes weeks, months or years, it can prove successful with all losses.


#1  Accept the reality:  Denial prevents true healing, because it keeps us from facing essential facts.  It is futile to relive the events associated with our loss and hope for a different outcome.


#2   Express and experience the real emotions:  Each person feels loss in different ways.  Dominant emotions include deep sadness, uncontrollable fear, raging anger, or profound loneliness.  As painful as these feelings are, healing demands confronting them with tears and shouts.


#3  Adjust to the new norm:  When a close friend moves or our house burns, things will never be the same again.  Losses change our schedules, sleeping arrangements, and financial security.  We may not need to like the changes, but we need to adjust to them.


#4  Reinvest:  Changes that we make are not designed to replace what was lost or to make us forget the past.  New jobs, friends, ministries, and hobbies simply allow our energies to be reinvested constructively.



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